Kids change a relationship. People always told me it would, but I didn't believe them. They also said that about getting married, and that wasn't true. My relationship didn't change much at all from before I was married until after. But, it did change after the arrival of our first child.
At first, it made me love my husband so much more. We bonded when I was pregnant, and in the first few weeks as we marveled at our new tiny bundle of joy. She was so tiny, so helpless, and we were clueless, so we bonded together and supported one another.
Then when we had to face real life again, and my husband went back to work, our relationship changed again. This time, however, not for the better. We began to resent each other. It was hard. He resented that I wasn't working, and I resented his resentment. Not to mention that I felt like he wasn't helping out anymore.
Then, I went back to work. At first it was just one day a week, but that really helped. I felt like I was contributing, and so did he.
Now, our baby is growing and changing. She is fast becoming a person with a personality all of her own. Her laughter and talking bring us both joy, and now we are bonding again. We laughed together the first time we fed her and she mushed her fingers in some avacadoe, and it was all over her face. We gushed at each other the first time she rolled over. With each new milestone, we bond again.
Sure, there are still times when we fight, argue, and resent each other. We fight about two things - money and the baby. But, in the end, she was made with love. Our love. I can only hope and pray that we will be able to love so much more that she will have a sibling some day!