Thursday, June 18, 2009

cars and houses

There are both good things and bad things going on at the moment, as is the case with life, I guess.
The bad thing is really not that bad. The car place phoned to say my car was ready (finally!), and I went to pick it up. I got in and drove away, only to realize 2 blocks later that there were a lot of dash lights on. I thought, I could not worry about it and call them, or I could turn around. So, I turned around and showed them the lights. They told me that it was Ok and that just the computer needed to be reset and I could drive the car. So, I left and went to work. Unfortunately, they called me to say that actually, I shouldn't be driving the car because I need a new "wire harness" (what IS that?!), and they needed to give me another rental. I just swapped the cars again, BOOOO!
On the other side, is the good side. I was in Sasktoon for a meeting yesturday. It was really quick, in and out, but it did help me realize something. I love where I live. I stayed with a friend who has a lovely house, but it is older and near a busy street. They didn't have aircon, and it was very hot. Having the window open made a huge difference, but then I could hear all the traffic from the street. Not to mention the group of kids at one in the morning on the corner who were yelling at each other! Needless to say, it was not restful.
At our house, it is SO quiet. We live on a quiet cresent and back onto farm land. Our house is far enough from our neighbors that I never hear them. There are no cars, or yelling kids to tend with, and our new house has aircon. Not just that, but I love the area. So many trees, a small town feel, wildlife nearby, and yet so close to the city that we can get anything anytime. We definately made the right choice when we bought this house. I would never go back!
Now, if we could just sell our other house....

Monday, June 8, 2009


I realize I was whining when I wrote yesturday. The rain always makes me depressed and grumpy.
Let's be realistic here. In a little less than one year, I have visited Halifax, Montreal, Thailand, BC, and San Diego. So, really, I shouldn't be complaining.
Sure, we have no "big trips" planned on the horizon, but we did just by a new house, a new dock, blinds for the house, and a whole speaker system for the house.
My hubby says that perhaps I am only truly happy when I am spending scads of money. Maybe he is right. I do get a high from it. He thinks that is a little crazy and maybe I should "talk to someone" about it. I think it is pretty normal to feel like that. Anyway, it is not like it is out of conntrol or something.
I was blaming my poor hubby, but without him I would spend all my money with little regard for things like taxes, savings, RRSPS, and property taxes. He takes care of the money situation and does an exceedingly good job.
I guess I just worry. I worry about running out of time. I worry I will decide to have kids, and it will be too late. I worry I will decide to travel, and it will be too late. I worry about spending all of my time at work. Life is just so short.
So, today I am going to try to turn over a new leaf. Despite the fact that it is still raining, I am goin to be thankful for what I have. Thankful for what has come to pass, and thankful for what may be. Maybe there is a compromise here. I could try, for the next few months, to not plan something. Instead do inexpensive things like go to the lake. Then, in the start of the new year I can plan a really nice hot trip somewhere. My hubby tells me he really does want to do that. Maybe we could even explore some of the places in our own back yard - Craik, Moose Jaw, Yorkton, etc. Maybe there is some hidden gem right here that I haven't yet found....

Sunday, June 7, 2009

Roads not travelled

I'm frustrated. I feel like I work a lot. Well, a reasonable amount anyway. I wouldn't want to work any harder. I know I make a decent amount of money. In fact, I saved a ton of money so I could make a large down payment on our new house. Now, however, I don't feel like I have any money. Or, at least that is what my husband tells me.
Ever since we incorporated, all of our money goes into the corporation. Sure, long term this is good. We can invest, make money, and save for our future. That is all very smart and mature. The problem is, I don't want to be mature.
I dreamed of the freedoms I would have when I finished school. I dreamed of seeing far away places, and experiencing new things. The list of places in the world that I would love to see has not decreased, but only grown as my knowledge of different places has increased. And yet here I sit, still dreaming. My hubby keeps telling me that we can't afford to go. It is too much money. We have too much stuff to pay for with a mortgage and property taxes and all that.
My question is: Why does this mundane stuff like mortgages and property taxes have to get in the way of living? 97% of the population has a mortgage. In my mind, it is just like paying for rent every month only you actually get something out of it in the end. Sure, it might be nice to pay it off, but should you kill yourself over it in the process?!
You can always say, we'll go later (this is what my husband says). We'll go when the house is paid for, the car is paid for, we retire....... But, what if that time never comes? What if, suddenly, you are struck with an illness, or accident, and you can't travel and experience the things you desire? Do you really want to risk looking back on your life and thinking, I should have..., I would have..., if only I could have...?
My husband says we shouldn't be "wasting money" all the time. He feels that if something isn't completly tangible forever (like a house, or car, or piece of marble), then it isn't worth having or doing. Travel just doesn't appeal to him. Why? Well, first it comes back to the tangible thing. Once the trip is over, he feels like that is it. No memories are worth that much money to him, and he can't be bothered to look at pictures. The other problem is he has seen all these places already. His family was in a very lucky position to be able to take him to Germany, Greece, Italy, Austria, etc. etc. So, other than Germany, why would he want to go again?
So, I could go by myself, but that comes with its own set of problems. First, if I went alone, he would be so mad at me. Not because I was travelling without him, but because I wouldn't be making money for that time period. He would be the only one "contributing" as he puts it. We almost got divorced when I took time off after finishing my residency for this reason.
Then, I could travel with someone, but it comes back to the money thing again. Not contributing again.
Finally, I really like travelling with him. I married him because most days I actually enjoy spending time with him. I think we travel well together. I would love to experience some of these things together.
So, despite figuring out a way we could fly to Frankfurt together for FREE, stay with his German family for FREE, and go on a mediterranean crise for CHEAP, here I still sit dreaming of the all roads not travelled.

Saturday, June 6, 2009


Last night we had a little house warming party. Mostly people from work. It was fun, but a bit of work (cleaning, food, planning, etc.). I still look around this house and think to myself, "Do we really live here?". Someone described it well yesturday, as a "grown-up house". And that it is. My hubby tells me I will die here (he never wants to buy another house, and still thinks buying this one was a bad idea), I disagree, but am happy here nonetheless.
Hoever, even as we are happy in our new grown-up house, I still think about our little condo. Alone, empty, just waiting patiently to be loved by someone again. We went by today, and I was a bit sad. On one hand I always felt like that was my hubby's house, not really mine. But, we did live there together and it was always where I stayed when I would come to Regina to do rotations, so there are memories there.
It is too bad that it hasn't sold yet. It is a nice little starter home, or executive condo. It was perfect for us - yard work and snow removal taken care of, but still in a great location and with nice upgrades within. I just can't believe that it wouldn't be perfect again for someone else.
The biggest problem is really the money. I wish we could sell it. That would help with the stress my hubby feels about buying this house. We would feel relieved. Maybe then he would be a bit more relaxed about spending money on frivolous things, like travel. However, in a buyers market in a recession, it is hard. I still think the right person will come along. We just have to be patient. As I said, it was perfect for us, so why not for someone else?